My three-year old has had a pacifier since day 1. She was definitely co-dependent on it and refused to give it up. Even when I’d say don’t you want to be a big girl she’d reply with the cutest face, “No mommy I’m a baby.” The fact that she could articulate that, made it obvious that it was time to let it go. Then our daycare provider made us leave the pacifier in the car once my daughter turned 2 1/2. So she was going from 7:30-3:30 without a pacifier. My husband was adamant about her keeping the pacifier at home until she’s ready, but he said if she lost the last pacifier we had it was over, no more pacifiers. One day I was in the shower and when I got out my daughter was watching television in my bedroom with no pacifier. I kept asking her where it was because it was almost time for bed. I then told her that the pacifier must be hiding from her to make it into a game. She had no idea where it was and then her dad starting looking frantically. I, on the other hand was calm and secretly excited until that night…She was the worst sleeper for about 2 weeks, but things got better and now she’s fine. This made me wonder what is my pacifier? What things, emotions, feelings am I holding onto that need to leave. When other people look at me they see that I am too mature for certain things and I recognize it too but as a comfort, I want to hold on to my “pacifier.” Whatever my “pacifier” is from complaining to unforgiveness, it has to go! Many of my friends and family thought I hid my daughter’s pacifier and I’m going on the record and saying I did not hide her pacifier. I’m glad it’s gone though! But I am responsible for the negativity that you will see disappearing from my life! I am totally responsible for those disappearances with the help of the Lord!!
I’ve heard that “It’s not you it’s me,” is a common phrase that someone says when they want to break up with someone and they dont want to hurt the other person’s feelings. I recently went to the dentist and had a terrible experience with a deep cleaning. The hygienist took forever and made a lot of negative comments that made me feel awful. All of my other dentists made me feel like i took pretty good care of my teeth so what was up with this lady? I was tempted to cancel and go to another dentist to avoid this particular hygienist, but in the end I thought maybe I’d get someone different in that office …and then that day SHE walked in. She began to examine my teeth in the same manner but her feedback was different, which i thought was odd. I told her that I thought her process was thorough and she chuckled and said yeah I have obsessive compulsive behaviors.
Then it clicked…so the first time I was embarrassed and ashamed about my teeth, but she made it clear that she has to get EVERY piece of plaque on every patient’s and it’s something she’s working on. That made me think about how that applies to everyday life. Sometimes when people repond to us negatively it isn’t even about us and because of our own insecurities we respond from a defensive place. So even though the phrase, “It’s not you, it’s me,” is clique, sometimes it’s true. Try and respond from love and see if you notice a difference not only in your life, but in your interactions with others. There’s a reason why Jesus said love your no neighbor as yourself.
And speaking of Him, the thorough cleaning that the hygienist conducted reminds me of how He takes His time during the process of growing us. He doesn’t rush through anything even if He realizes it may be painful for us, He knows in the end its for our greater good. I’d rather all of the “plaque” in my life be removed so I can be more like Him!